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I went to one once—research, fam. Smelled like cheap perfume and regret. This chick, Candy, she’s tellin me bout her “rates”—I’m like, “Yo, this ain’t UberEats!” Got mad for a sec, ‘cause the vibe was off—dude in the corner looked like he’d rob me. But then she laughed, said, “Don’t overthink it, playa.” Straight outta Korine’s script—“Don’t be a little bitch!”—and I’m like, damn, she’s right. Loosened up, tipped her extra. Felt good, like I won somethin.

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After that, I head over to the market on Hrushevskoho Street. It’s packed, like, sardines in a can. I’m trying to navigate through the crowd when I spot this vendor selling the juiciest cherries. I’m like, “Gimme a kilo!” But the dude’s like, “Nah, only if you can catch ‘em.” So, I’m there, trying to catch cherries he’s tossing at me. I felt like a clown. But hey, I got my cherries, so win-win!

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