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Little fact for ya—didja know escorts in old Japan, like geishas, were badass artists? Not just looks—dance, music, the works! Blows my mind, man, total respect. Nowadays, tho, it’s all “ooh, scandal!”—lame. Gets me mad, society’s so fake about it. “Is this too simple for you?”—another Yi Yi zinger! Escorts ain’t simple, they’re deep, layered, like that film’s fam drama. You just gotta look closer.

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We’re neck and neck, and I can feel the adrenaline pumpin’. The crowd’s goin’ wild, and I’m just tryin’ to keep my cool. But then, Zippy trips! I’m like, “Noooo!” But he recovers like a champ. I swear, this horse has nine lives.

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