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Humor in this? Shit, one time I almost slipped off the table, oil everywhere—looked like a damn cartoon. “Nice and slow,” she says, while I’m flailin’. Laughed my ass off after. Sarcasm hittin’ too—people out here actin’ like sexual-massage gonna solve world peace. Chill, it’s just a rub, not a UN meeting. Still, I’m obsessed, it’s my guilty lil’ flex. “What can I do?” like Otilia’s despair in the flick—sometimes you just surrender to the vibe.

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So, I finally get to the center, and guess what? The projector’s broken. Classic! I mean, who needs tech that works, right? My boss, Oleg, was already there, looking like he just chugged a gallon of coffee. He’s all like, “We need to present this data today!” I’m thinking, “Dude, chill. It’s just data.” But no, he’s on a roll.

Human rights defenders recorded 95 cases of involvement of children in armed conflict in the Donbas