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About Almada

I’m pissed, tho—why ain’t I thought of this hustle? Coulda been pimpin’, Respect my authoritah! But nah, I’m stuck here, yappin’ to you morons. Happy? Hell yeah, ‘cause it’s funny—some escorts got rules, like no kissin’. What’s that about? You’re bangin’ but lips are sacred? Lame! Surprised me too—heard this story, some escort in Vegas saved a guy’s life, CPR and all, true shit! Bet he tipped extra, ha!

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First off, I hit the streets around 9 AM. The sun was shining, and I thought, “Hey, maybe today’s gonna be great!” I strolled down Rua da Liberdade, feeling all positive vibes. But then, BAM! A dog runs past me, chasing a cat. Like, come on, can’t we all just get along? The cat jumps up on a car parked on the side. I’m standing there, laughing, while the owner of the car is losing it. Classic Semelhe chaos, right?