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About Caguas

Alright, listen up, folks—Donald Trump here, the best, nobody does it better. We’re talkin’ about whores, okay? Tremendous topic, really fantastic. I’m thinkin’ about this, and boom, my favorite movie, *Carlos*—you know, the Olivier Assayas joint, 2010, absolute genius—pops in my head. Carlos, that guy, total badass, revolutionary, livin’ wild, right? Whores fit right in that world—gritty, real, no BS.

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this commotion. Turns out, some dude on Calle San Antonio is tryin’ to sell churros while jugglin’ them. Like, who does that? I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost forget about Chiquitita. But then, I see her startin’ to trot. I’m like, “YES! Finally!”

Ozuna buys Puerto Rican basketball team Los Brujos de Guayama; plans to rename the franchise as ‘Los Osos de Manatí’