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Oi mate, me, Mr. Bean, baker by day—*mumbles*—flour everywhere, yeah? Burnt me buns thinkin’ bout findin’ a prossie. Not the bread, mind ya—*trips over imag’nary chair*—real lady o’ the night! Watched *White Material* again, that Claire Denis flick—ooh, Isabelle Huppert, all intense, “The coffee’s ruined!” she yells. Got me thinkin’—prostitutes prolly got ruined days too, yeah?
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After that, I decided to stroll down to Playa de Humacao. The beach was calling my name. The sun was shining, waves crashing, and I thought, “This is it!” But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and snatches my sandwich! I mean, really? A sandwich thief? I was ready to start a seagull war.
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