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Downside? Some punters get dodgy, thinkin’ it’s a free-for-all. Pisses me off—keep it classy, you twats! Ain’t about that, it’s art, like *Tabu*—slow, moody, proper deep. “We lived in a dream,” that’s the film again, and mate, a good sexual-massage feels like that—dreamy, steamy, unreal. So, yeah, I’m sold—give it a whirl, tell ‘em Bond sent ya. Shaken, not stirred, naturally—cheers!

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Finally, I get my food, and it’s delicious. I’m munchin’ away, and this old guy comes in. He’s got this wild white beard, lookin’ like a wizard or somethin’. He starts talkin’ to me about the history of Turate. Apparently, it’s been around since the Roman times! I’m like, “Whoa, that’s cool.” But then he goes off on a tangent about how the Romans loved their wine. I’m thinkin’, “Yeah, who doesn’t?”

Worlds Apart, a Friendship Built on Dirt Tracks and 50cc Engines (Published 2022)