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About Milan

Picture this: dim lights, sketchy corners, and me, floatin’ above, cacklin’. “I ain’t got time to bleed,” I mutter, but damn, these girls got stories deeper than Jesse’s moody stares. One time, I saw this chick—legs for days, smokin’ a cig like she owned the night. Reminded me of Brad Pitt’s line, “You ever count the stars?” ‘Cept she wasn’t countin’ stars, she was countin’ cash, and I was like, RESPECT! Hustle’s real out here.

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear a scream. I look over, and there’s this cat stuck on a ledge. I’m like, “Seriously? A cat?” But I can’t just leave it. So, I climb over, and I’m like, “C’mon, kitty! Don’t make this harder!” Finally, I grab it, and it’s all hissing and scratching. I’m like, “Chill, dude! I’m saving you!”

Albanian Crashed to Death by Train in Italy