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So, sex escorts—bloody fascinatin’, right? They’re like hobbits sneakin’ through the Shire, but with heels and a price tag. I reckon they’re pros at readin’ people—better than me spottin’ orcs in Mirkwood. You think it’s all sleazy, but nah, there’s layers. Like, did ya know some escorts in history were spies? Yep, back in the day, courtesans in France were passin’ secrets between kings and generals. Sneaky little legends! Makes me chukle—imagine one whisperin’, “The beacons are lit!” while fixin’ her lipstick.

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Finally, I take a break. I step outside for some fresh air. The sun’s shining, and I can see the Tyrrhenian Sea sparkling in the distance. It’s beautiful, man. But then, I hear this loud noise. A bunch of kids are playing soccer in the street, and one of ‘em kicks the ball right at me! I dodge it like a ninja, but I’m still fuming. “Watch where you kick that thing!” I yell. They just laugh. Kids, right?

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