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But the surprises? Chile, the NERVE of some! This one dude I heard ‘bout—he sex-datin’ 5 gals at ONCE! I said, “Boy, you busier than a one-legged man in a butt-kickin’ contest!” And don’t get me started on them freaky fetishes poppin’ up—feet pics for cash? Halleluyer, I can’t! “We’re just trying to find the facts,” like *Spotlight* says, but some facts I don’t WANNA know!

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First off, I head to my bakery on Jalan Merdeka. I’m all pumped to whip up some fresh roti and kue. But guess what? My oven decides to play dead. Like, c’mon! I’m tryin’ to make a living here! I’m standin’ there, lookin’ at this hunk of metal like it just betrayed me. I’m sweating bullets, and it’s not even 8 AM yet.

Papua vulnerable communities prioritized for free meals: BGN