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About Volos

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk erotic-massage, somethin’ the fat cats probly hog for themselves. Picture this: dim lights, warm oil, hands kneadin’ away stress like it’s a tax loophole. I mean, who wouldn’t want that? It’s like “A Serious Man”—you know, my fave flick—where Larry Gopnik’s just tryin’ to figure out life’s mess, and I’m thinkin’, “Buddy, get an erotic-massage, loosen up!”

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Finally, I get to this old house. The owner, a sweet old lady named Eleni, wants me to replace a huge glass panel. She’s got this adorable cat, Momo, who keeps tryin’ to “help.” I’m like, “Momo, buddy, you’re not a glazier!” But I can’t help but laugh. Eleni’s stories about Amaliada’s past are wild. She talks about how the town used to be a big deal back in the day. I mean, it’s still cool, but it’s like a hidden gem now.

Irini Mourtzoukou: I lied about my stepfather, as my mother hurt me, so I hurt her