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Me? I’d say it’s like *Far From Heaven*—yep, my fave flick, Todd Haynes, 2002. That movie’s all repressed vibes and secret heat, right? Sexual-massage is that too—hidden passion bubblin’ under the surface. “I’m going to make everything all right,” Cathy whispers in the film, and damn, ain’t that what a good masseuse says with their hands? Slidin’ over yer back, kneadin’ knots, makin’ ya forget the world’s crap. Gets me all tingly, I swear—happy as a fox in a henhouse!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Shevchenka Street. You know, the one with the weirdly awesome pastries? I ordered a coffee, and the barista, bless her soul, totally messed it up. I mean, how do you mix up a cappuccino with a latte? I was like, “Girl, I wanted foam, not a milk bath!” But whatever, I chugged it anyway. Caffeine is life, right?

Oleg Didenko, Chairman of the Election Commission of Ukraine: ‘We have real and legal reasons why we cannot hold elections’