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So, sexual-massage – raspy hiss – it’s old, man! Ancient Greeks did it, callin’ it “anatripsis” – fancy, huh? Rubbin’ for health, but sneaky bastards slipped in the sexy bits! Makes me giggle, precious, thinkin’ ‘bout togas and oil. Tried it once – oh yesss – this chick, hands like magic, slidin’ everywhere! Felt like floatin’, but horny floatin’, y’know? Got me all tingly – “My precious!” – couldn’t stop grinnin’ like a fool.

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Then there's Plaza Mayor. Bro, it's like the central nervous system of Benavente. Locals hang out there, sipping coffee, chatting about life and sometimes airing grievances (you know, all that family drama stuff that gets me, a family psychologist, mad and happy all at once; haha!). I remember once a couple argued right there and it struck me, “Great Scott, even the city has its own therapy sessions, man!”

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