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But—agh, what pisses me off? Catfishers, mate. Liars with fake pics, wastin’ my time. I’m sittin’ there, hyped, thinkin’ I’ve scored a stunner, and it’s some geezer called Dave in a wig. Fumin’! Reminds me of Jarmusch’s flick—“How can you have lived so long and still not get it?” Cos I don’t get it—why lie? Just be you, warts n all, an’ shag someone who’s into that!

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Yo, so lemme tell ya 'bout Sananduva (br)! I'm livin here, like, years now and it's freakin awesome. Streets are lit, man. There’s Rua das Flores – super chill vibe, old-school shops, and donuts at dawn. Like, I literally dove into my dating app coding here in that zone – “That’s what she said!”