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About Hastings

So, check it—hustlin’ for a hooker ain’t like flippin’ through Yelp, nah. Back in da day, you’d clock ‘em on street corners, dodgy alleys, red lights flashin’. Now? It’s all digital, innit—apps, coded ads, “massage” listings. Blows my mind, bruv! I was chattin’ me mate Daz, he’s like, “Ali, it’s bare easy now, just scroll X, fam!” I’m like, what?! Technology, innit, turnin’ prossies into Uber Eats. One tap, boom, “30 mins or less.” Mad ting!

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So, I finally grab some fish and chips. I’m walking back, feeling like a king, when I trip over a crack in the sidewalk. Seriously, Te-Hapara, fix your streets! I’m down on the ground, chips flying everywhere. I’m like, “Great, just great.” But then this little kid runs up and hands me a chip he picked up. I’m like, “Thanks, buddy! You’re a lifesaver!” Kids can be so pure, ya know?

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