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Ooh, then there’s the good side—escorts can be sweet! Like in *Tabu*, “Love is a crocodile tear”—sometimes they just there to hold ya hand, make ya feel special. I knew this fella, Jimmy, paid an escort just to sit and listen to him cry bout his dog dyin. Ain’t that wild? Made me happy, tho—poor man needed a shoulder! Surprised me too, cause I thought escortin was all hanky-panky, but nope, sometimes it’s just company!

Germany vs Poland: Arsenal goalkeeper Wojciech Szczesny ruled out of Euro 2016 Group C tie

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But then, outta nowhere, I see this kid trip over his own feet. I mean, it was like a slow-motion movie scene. He goes down, and I’m just standing there, trying not to laugh. But then he starts crying, and my heart just sinks. I rush over, and I’m like, “Hey, buddy, you okay?” He looks up at me with these big, teary eyes, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna be fine. Just a little scrape!”

Pope Francis: Tributes, mass and vigils held in towns and cities across Europe