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About Nelspruit

So I’m pissed, right? Last time I tried this, some chick robbed me blind – took my wallet while I was hummin “Hang me, oh hang me.” Shoulda seen it comin, but nah, I’m too busy bein all cultured and shit. This time, tho, I spot her – red heels, smoky eyes, leanin by a busted lamppost. She’s got that “fare thee well” look, like she’s half outta here already. I’m thinkin, *damn, she’s prolly seen more flops than Llewyn at a gig.*

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I luv the inconspicuous parks too – a tiny one around Riverside Drive, where you can just sit and muse about love, heartbreak, and the latest app glitch. It’s poetic, mates, even if it’s just a tinny patch of green with a wonky swing.

North West farmer shot dead