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But lemme rant—here’s what pisses me off. These holier-than-thou types judgin’ escorts like they’re scum. Excuse me?! Who’re you, Mr. Perfect? “Oh, I’d never pay for it!” Yeah, right—half these clowns are swipin’ Tinder like it’s a full-time job! At least escorts are upfront—cash on the table, no bullshit. None of this “I’ll call ya” crap. Pretty, pretty good system, if ya think about it. Like Remy sneakin’ into that kitchen—rules be damned, he’s gettin’ his!

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So yeah, friend, come on over. Experience its quiet corners, its loud malls, the riverside secrets and street symphonies. Short-Pump (us) is a living museum of contradictions, wild moods that turn every massage into a journey. “Anyone can cook”—but only here do you find the true recipe of life, raw and a lil' offbeat.

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