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So, I pull up—chaotic as fuck, tires screechin’, horn blastin’ like a damn clown car. She’s all, “You got cash, fam?” and I’m like, “Girl, I got SKILLS—teach ya to parallel park!” She laughs, like, “Bruh, I ain’t tryna park nothin’!” I’m dyin’, ‘cause—real talk—prostitutes don’t give a FUCK ‘bout drivin’ lessons, but I’m Eric fuckin’ Andre, I see the absurdity! She’s out here hustlin’, and I’m tryna make it a driver’s ed skit!

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Now lemme sprinkle some secrets: There's a little hole-in-the-wall music joint on Birch that no regular tourist ever catches. And there's a quirky bookstore on Fifth, all mismatched shelves, loads of character—you might even bump into a local poet recitin’ wild lines. This city’s got personality, and I just can’t get enough.

Gordon Ellis Obituary - Oneonta, NY