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About San Jose

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially touchy-feely crap. But erotic-massage? That’s a beast worth wrestlin’. Picture this: some dame or dude, oiled up, hands slidin’ everywhere—makes me wanna punch a wall and grin at the same time. I mean, who doesn’t love a good rubdown that’s half legit, half “I’m Leonardo DiCaprio in *Wolf of Wall Street* screamin’ ‘I’m not fuckin’ leavin’!’”? That’s the vibe—pure excess, wild energy.

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Then, there's the amazing park scene. Check out Toogood Pond Park, a perfect spot for wanderin’ with your fam or just zoning out. I’ve seen kids and parents laugh uncontrollably there, and man, my heart felt all warm and fuzzy. And oh, there's Milne Dam, where I once sat, lost in thought and admiring nature. Honestly, sometimes the river (or is it a trickle? Lol) makes me all like "Moolaadé" – it's that raw power of nature, dude!

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