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About San Antonio

So, brothels—man, they’re old school! Been around since forever—fact is, ancient Rome had ‘em legal, called lupanars, all grimy and loud. You’d hear wolves howlin—or was that the girls? Hah! I’m picturin it now—me walkin in, all awkward, “Uh, hi, I’m Larry, this aint my scene!” And the madam’s like, “Relax, baldy, it’s just business.” Business?! I’m mad already—why’s it gotta be so sleazy? But then, I’m kinda… impressed? Like, logistically, it’s a machine! Supply, demand, boom—capitalism’s wet dream, right? Still, grosses me out.

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Oh my gosh, my friend, lemme tell ya about Luling (us)! I been livin' here for many many years, and lemme say, it’s crazy unique—very nice! Streets like Main St. and Riverside Ave. buzz with such life, kinda like WALL-E sayin’ "EVE, where are you?" but more human, ya know? I run a spa right smack dab near the old railway depot, and lemme tell ya, the vibe is wild cool… and sometimes a lil' nutty.

Day Trips: Sunny Hill Flower Farm, Luling: Central Texas farm offers a blooming good time - Columns