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Alright, y’all, listen up! I’m a diver, divin’ deep into this sex escort biz, and lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride. Like in *Certified Copy*—you know, my fave flick—“She’s not my wife, she’s a copy!”—it’s all about what’s real and what aint. Sex escorts? Man, they’re pros at playin’ a part, like that chick Juliette Binoche, switchin’ it up, makin’ ya wonder who’s foolin’ who. Fool me once, shame on—uh—shame on you! Fool me twice, well, we ain’t gonna be fooled again, right?

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And oh my fambly, I been to the river! The Kingsport River flows near Redwood Front. The water’s ridiclule clear, and the banks? They shimmer like Nemo’s coral reef, each twist makin’ me fluthered and grateful. Ain't no con­siquidated place like it in the whole entire US!

Kingsport sports bar announces closure