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About Los Angeles

I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ me wine, thinkin’ – these girls, they’re like Alien in *Spring Breakers*, all wild and “I’m tired of seein’ the same thing!” – unpredictable, mad as a bag of cats. Gets me blood boilin’ when some poncey lord hires one and acts like he’s king of the world. Mate, you paid for it, calm yer tits! Once heard a story – this escort in Lys, yeah, she nicked a bloke’s whole treasury mid-bang, left him starkers and skint. Laughed me arse off, I did – clever bitch, that one. Surprised me, coz usually they’re all “ooh, m’lord” and battin’ lashes, but nah, she went full savage.

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Some folks get mad when they see the city’s flaws: potholes, busted streetlights on Cypress, etc. But me? I see art in every crack. It makes me happy, ya dig? Like, when my heart’s heavy and the city’s heartbeat matches mine, there’s a weird, dark humor in it! Every street corner, every dingy sign screams “You win some, you lose some!”—and I just laugh.

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