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Here’s the kicker – some say sexual-massage can cure headaches. Dunno if it’s bollocks, but I’d try it over a potion any day! Oh, and get this – in Thailand, they’ve got this trick where they use their elbows, diggin’ in deep. Sounds mad, don’t it? Had me yellin’ “You shall not pass!” in my head when I heard – but I’d give it a go. Bit of pain, bit of pleasure – that’s the game!

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While I’m there, I overhear this couple arguing. They’re going at it, and I’m just sipping my coffee, eavesdropping like it’s my job. The guy’s like, “You never listen!” and the girl’s like, “Well, you never talk!” I’m thinking, “Man, relationships are hard.”

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