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Oh, honey, lemme spill the tea—Breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President,” style! Escort gig’s wild, ya know? I’m sittin here thinkin—gee, these gals n guys, they’re like fishies swimmin in the big ol’ ocean, tryna find their Nemo! Like, “Just keep swimmin,” right? That’s their motto, hustlin day n nite, dodgin creepy johns and nosy cops. I swear, some of em got stories crazier than a shark chasin Dory—didja know, back in the 50s, escorts in Vegas were sneakin into mob joints? Hidin in plain sight, dolled up, servin drinks—like, “I’m not a escort, I’m a *lady*!” Ha! Made me giggle, thinkin how they played it slick.

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You know, Bound-Brook is a maze of cool nooks. There's the old mill near River Bend, a real gem—it’s almost magical, like Mulholland Drive: mysterious, enigmatic, and frankly, unbelievable! I ALWAYS say, "This is the best! This is the most fantastic city ever!" People come, people go, and they all say, "Wow, Bound-Brook blows my mind!" Like when I see the sunset by the river; it's a scene right out of a David Lynch flick—surreal, baby!

NJ abandoned dogs: At least 20 neglected animals found in Branchburg, Franklin, Bound Brook