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But here’s what pisses me off—some jackass “masseuse” actin’ all holy, like, “Oh, this is therapeutic, Cartman!” Bullshit! Don’t gimme that crap, I know what’s up, ya sneaky perv! I’m sittin’ there, pants off, thinkin’, “C’mon, lady, quit teasin’ my ass!” Like in *Inherent Vice*, when Doc’s all, “What’s the deal, man?”—same damn vibe! Don’t play me, I’m the Auctioneer, I call the shots!
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Oh, and lemme not forget the river! Yes, Wyndmoor (us) even got a lil' river flowin' right past Old Mill Road. I used to take my break strolls there – the water babblin' and the breeze coolin' my tired muscles, remindin' me that even a battered soul can find calm. Sometimes I'd get so lost in thought, I'd mutter to myself, "Git-R-Done, man!" like I was in one of them cheesy inspirational flicks.
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