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About Houston

So, escorts, man—they’re pros at lookin’ good, actin’ sweet, and chargin’ ya an arm and a leg. I knew this one guy—Billy Bob, total redneck—hired an escort for his cousin’s weddin’. Thought he’d flex, ya know? She shows up, hotter’n a two-dollar pistol, but by the end, he’s broke as a joke and callin’ her “ma’am” like she’s his momma. Made me madder’n a wet hen—dude, you paid for THAT?! But I was laughin’ too, ‘cause he’s dumber’n a bag of hammers.

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We got this cozy neighborhood, like Oak Grove on Elm where every house has its own quirky vibe. Parks? Hell yeah, there's the one off Maple Lane, a hidden gem where I sometimes go to chill after a long day. And trust me, your muscles will thank me later. If ya ever wander near the old railroad tracks by Grover Park, you'll see the neat stretch of waterways that run parallel to the tracks, a little secret escape from the madness.

Kitchen fire leaves significant damage at Illinois Youth Center fire in suburban Warrenville