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Oh, and the profiles—hilarious! “Lookin’ for my soulmate”—nah, you’re after a quickie! Sarcasm aside, it’s brill how bold people get. Some dude wrote, “I’m a sex god”—mate, calm down, you’re not me! Worst bit? The pressure—everyone’s actin’ like it’s a porn audition. Chill, baby, it’s just a date! “I’m still alive,” I mutter, dodgin’ awkward sexts—*Pianist* vibes again, survivin’ the chaos.

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First off, you hit up Mapleview Street. Yup, that’s where the charm’s at – all those quirky lil' cafes and that vintage bookstore, “The Cheeky Page,” down by the corner. I remember one time, I was strollin’ around, thinkin’ ‘bout love and lust, and that bookshop just pulled me right in. It got me feelin’ like a lost soul from "Inherent Vice" – wild, unexpected, and downright freaky at times, ya dig?

St George and the Dragon take to village green for celebration afternoon