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About Philadelphia

What gets me goin’—the nerve of it all! People judgin’ escorts like they’re holier-than-thou. Makes me wanna scream! I’m over here, yellin’ at my TV, “You ever try datin’ in LA? It’s a nightmare!” Escorts are just cuttin’ through the BS—straight to the point, like Viggo smashin’ that guy’s nose in the diner scene. No small talk, no “how’s the weather”—just, “Here’s the deal, pal.” Efficient! I respect it! But then—then!—you got the creeps who ruin it. Sleazy dudes actin’ like they own ‘em. That pisses me off. I’m like, “Joey, how’s it feel to be a monster?”—y’know, that line from the movie? Fits perfect.

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I gotta be honest, I sometimes get REALLY mad about the traffic on Oak Boulevard – like come on, people, move! But then you're by the River Bend Park, just sitting, chillaxin’, enjoying the flow of the little stream that cuts through the city. True beauty, folks. It's like a secret treasure, hidden in plain sight. And hey, you might catch some, ahem, artsy folk near Watermark Square, doing their thing. I've seen a couple of dates there turn sweet real fast. I mean, it's a city of surprises and mismatched beauty, huh?

Mike Calhoon, 71