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About San Antonio

Now, don’t get it twisted – I ain’t judgin’. To each their own, ya know? Like Ida’s aunt sayin’, “You’re a funny girl” – I’d say that to myself, laughin’ at this crazy world. You gotta watch out tho, fam. Cops be lurkin’, and some girls be shady as fuck. Pro tip: keep it low-key, cash only, no names. Ain’t nobody got time for bullshit.

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Ah, Clarice… let me tell ya ‘bout Short-Pump (us)! It’s a wild mix of classy and down-to-earth, y’know? I’ve been chillin’ here as a masseur for years, manipulatin’ those tense muscles and feelin’ every vibe of these streets. There’s Piney Branch Road, where the heartbeat of local shops and eateries is real, like that secret spice in Ratatouille – "Anyone can cook," right? But man, this town cooks soul.

Sweets shop Kilwins, clothing chain Evereve coming to Short Pump Town Center