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But real talk, it’s fascinatin’. These apps, man, they’re like a meat market—everyone’s posin’, flexin’, tryna look tasty. Reminds me of *Eternal Sunshine*—all that messy love crap. “Sand is overrated, it’s just tiny rocks,” right? That’s sex-dating profiles for ya—just polished turds hopin’ to shine. I get a kick outta it tho, scrollin’ through, judgin’ these fools. One guy said he’s “fluent in sarcasm”—buddy, you ain’t fluent in spellin’, calm down.

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Man, some days I get mad – like, the city ain’t always so pretty. The alleys near the old factory on Bridge St? Total nightmare. No shade, but it’s real. I gotta say, nothing brings out the absurdity of human desire like watching the neon lights of downtown flicker on the cracked sidewalks. I swear, one time I overheard a couple arguing ‘bout, you know, wild kinks, while our local stray cat was just starin’ at them – wild scene, I kid you not.

5 Portage school districts have levies on May ballot