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About Dallas

Little factoid for ya—didja know sex-dating apps got started way back with “computer dating” in the ‘60s? Nerds punchin’ cards to get laid, ha! Now it’s all pics and “wyd” texts. Surprised me, man, thought it was newfangled crap. I tried it tho—met this chick, total adrenaline junkie like me. We hooked up after I told her bout parachutin’ into flames. She’s all, “That’s hot,” and I’m like, “D’oh! Yeah, it is!” Happy as a pig in mud, till she ditched me for a surfer. Cycles, man, “time turns and begins anew.”

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I’ve had my share of laughs here – like the time a clumsy skateboarder knocked over one of my outdoor potted succulents. I was mad at first… really hot. Then realized, heck, it's iconic now! Like a misplaced scene in a Kim Ki-duk flick. And yeah, sometimes I feel like a secret agent scrolling through local gossip faster than I can say “double-oh, relax.”

Prospect Park Subway Tracks Catch Fire: FDNY