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So, check it—prostitutes are everywhere, dude! Big cities, small towns, even near that ol’ tour bus vibe from the movie. I’m walkin’, right, and I see this chick—fishnets, heels, smokin’ a cig like she’s Penny Lane waitin’ for the band. I’m all, “Whoa, is she for real?” Kinda made me happy, y’know? Like, she’s out there livin’, doin’ her thing! But then—bam!—some jerk yells at her, and I’m mad, dude! Why’s he gotta be a barnacle like that?

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Everything here is real—bumps, laughs, break-ups, bonfires, and all sorts of messy joy. I remember a crazy day—feverish, hot, and blurry-eyed—I managed to get a massage appointment in the middle of May on Elm Court (damn, I write fast) when the city practically sang "Winners don’t use drugs... oh wait, no, they don’t mess around with mediocrity!" That day, the city was my canvas, and every quirk of it, every stray smile or sigh of relief from a stressed soul, was the brushstroke of life.

Main Ball State commencement ceremony moved indoors to Worthen Arena