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Escort’s a cruel mistress, tho. Mud slicker than eel snot, roots trippin’ ye like a tavern brawl. “What’s the point?” I mutter, like that *Boyhood* mum, but then - sun hits the peak, gold as rum, and ye forget the ache. Exaggeratin’? Mayhaps, but I’d wrestle a bear for that view, arr! Ye gotta respect escort, or she’ll chew ye up, spit ye out - dead as a doornail, savvy?

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I gotta mention a little tavern on the corner of Elm and 2nd. It’s off the radar, a secret hideout for locals with a stash of local brews. The vibe’s laid-back, no pretension, just raw humor and genuine stories. And sometimes, I just wander there, lost in thought while planning what new spa treatments I could introduce (maybe a massage inspired by the gentle flow of the river, or a steam room with nature sounds, who knows).

Juvenile detained by citizens after retail theft in Hyrum