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Oh, and the lies—don’t get me started! Dudes sayin’ they’re 6’2” when they’re 5’7”—stand next to a tuna, buddy, you’re busted! Chicks sayin’ they’re “chill” but show up with a 10-page sex contract. Surprised me first time—thought I’d need a lawyer, not lube! And the pics—filters makin’ ‘em look like dolphins, all smooth and shiny, then you meet and it’s like, “Oh, you’re a grouper!” Brutal, man, brutal.

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I get kinda piss'd off sometimes, ya know, when things get too corporate-y at the new mall on Kamehameha Hwy. It’s like, forget the cookie cutter chains – I mean, come on, people, let’s keep it real. But then you step out to the side streets, like Shipwreck Lane, and BAM! The real Ewa shows up: authentic, untamable, and full o' heart.

City Golf expands resident ID card services to West Loch and Ewa Villages