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About Ettelbruck

Oi, mate, it’s me, Mr. Bean, heh, stumblin’ thru life! So, erotic-massage, yeah? Wot a thing, eh! Picture this—me, all clumsy, walkin’ into some dodgy parlor, oops, tripped over me own feet, bam, faceplant! “Whoa, easy, friend,” I mumble, all red-faced, cos it’s steamy in there, innit? Them soft hands, rubbin’ oil, ooh, slippery like a camel in Timbuktu! Like that line from me fave flick, *Timbuktu*—‘The wind carries secrets, huh?’—cept here it’s moans, not secrets, heh!

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Now lemme spill: there's the Eisebann park, yeah? Mad green spots but also a vibe like "time dissolves into memory"—like in that film, Syndromes and a Century. It takes you on a mind-bending trip, feels surreal, a bit like you're caught between worlds. I often sit on a bench there, watch the river Alzette (it kinda wiggles through town, like a lazy snake) and think: what the hell is life? Yup, that's me, a relaxation specialist, just soaking in the chaos.

Going viral on social media: Video showing cruel practice in Ettelbruck slaughterhouse causes criticism