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Yo, what’s good, fam? I’m Eric Andre, your wild-ass mountain guide, here to spill the tea on this peak called Whore! Yeah, Whore, baby—straight up chaotic vibes! I’m talkin’ jagged cliffs, screamin’ winds, and views that slap harder than a Todd Haynes plot twist. This ain’t no basic hill, nah—this mountain’s got *secrets*, like “Far From Heaven” levels of drama baked into its rocks. “I’m living a lie!”—that’s Whore yellin’ at the sky, bro, all moody and extra.

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Then, outta nowhere, my mate Dave texts me. “Pub after work?” he says. I’m like, “Hell yes!” I need a pint after this madness. But then, just as I’m about to reply, the fire alarm goes off. Like, seriously? In the middle of my workday?

A6120 Horsforth: 6.6-mile diversions lifted as new merge lane opens after resurfacing on Leeds outer ring road