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Little fact for ya—back in the ‘90s, before apps, folks used newspaper ads for hookups. “Man seeks woman, no strings”—straight-up savage! Imagine Amélie reading that, blushin’ over her coffee. Nowadays, it’s all Tinder and Bumble—bam, bam, sex on speed dial. But here’s the tea: 1 in 5 matches actually bangs IRL. Rest? Ghost city, baby. Drives me nuts—why swipe if you’re just gonna vanish?

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Then, outta nowhere, this old bloke comes up to me. He’s got a twinkle in his eye and says, “You look like you need a story.” I’m like, “You have no idea.” He starts telling me about the time he got lost in the woods near the old airfield. I’m cracking up. This guy’s a legend!

Killer who caused deaths of four siblings in house fire could be up for release as soon as next month