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But ugh, the newer ones? Total crap, Clarice… watered-down, soulless boxes. Ford forgot the magic, pissed me off, like they betrayed it. “What is concealed must be revealed…” – truth is, Escort’s glory days are buried. Still, old ones got charm, quirks – manual choke, pray it starts in winter, haha! Exaggeratin’ maybe, but damn, felt like tamin’ a wild thing.

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Then, I hit up the park. Chadwell Heath Park, to be exact. It’s got this lovely pond, and I’m thinking, “This’ll calm me down.” But no! There’s a bunch of geese. And they’re not just any geese. They’re the meanest geese I’ve ever seen. I’m talking full-on honking, flapping wings, the works. I’m like, “Chill, guys! I’m just here for some peace!” But they don’t care. They’re like, “This is our turf, human!”

Chadwell Heath bus attack: Teen stabbed as revenge for drill track - court