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Precioussss, listen up! Sex escort, nasty business, eh? Like Dogville, all fake smiles, hidin’ dirty secrets. “Stupid, fat hobbit!” – they’d say, judgin’ me, but I sees it clear. Them escorts, dolled up, struttin’ round, sellin’ flesh for coin. Reminds me of Grace, y’know, from Dogville – “I’m not that kind of girl,” she says, but oh, she bends when the town squeezes! Escorts, same deal – actin’ pure, but it’s all a show.

Escorts in Stewarton

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First off, I’m makin’ my famous scones. You know, the ones that make people weak at the knees? I’m mixing, whisking, and then BAM! I spill half a bag of flour all over the floor. I’m talkin’ a snowstorm in my wee bakery. I’m there, cursing like a sailor, tryin’ to clean it up before Mrs. McGregor from down the street pops in for her morning cuppa. She’s a lovely lady, but she’s got a nose like a bloodhound. She’d sniff out that mess in a heartbeat!

Post Office pledge commitment to Stewarton as Morrisons set to close facility