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Den dere’s da other escort—ya know, *wink wink*, da “company” kind. Tropical Malady got dat vibe too, “You smell like da tiger,” all sensual and weird. Dis one time, heard ‘bout dis escort chick in Bangkok—clients paid her in gold bars, not cash! Gold bars, can ya believe? She’d strut in, all classy, den vanish like a ghost. Made me mad tho—why gold? Cash ain’t good enough? Pfft, greedy much?

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Then, boom! Outta nowhere, it starts pouring. Like, biblical rain. I’m talking Noah’s Ark levels. I dash out, trying to avoid the puddles on Cairnryan Road. But of course, I step right into one. My shoes are soaked. Great start, right? I’m fuming, but then I see this kid splashing around. He’s having the time of his life. I can’t help but smile. Kids, man. They find joy in the simplest things.

Man charged following cannabis cultivation discoveries across Aberdeenshire