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Little factoid for ya – they say 1 in 5 hookups start online now. Ain’t that wild? Surprised me, sure, but then I’m like, duh, everybody’s horny and lazy! I dig it, tho – cuts the bullshit. No “where’s this goin’” talks, just wham, bam, thank you, ma’am. Sometimes I’m scrollin’, seein’ these profiles, thinkin’, “Man, I’m too old for this,” but then – pow – some babe’s sendin’ nudes and I’m back in the game, feelin’ like a fuckin’ king.

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Then, outta nowhere, this old bloke starts tellin’ stories about Lyneham’s history. Apparently, there’s been a settlement here since the Iron Age. Who knew? I mean, I thought it was just a sleepy little town. He went on about the old railway and how it used to be a big deal. I was half-listenin’, half-trying to throw darts.

B4069 Lyneham Banks reopens after landslip and rebuild