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Weird thought - granny in film, frail, stroked out. Sexual-massage on her? Fuckin’ dark comedy gold! Haneke’d smirk at that. Anyway, costs a ton, cashiers don’t roll deep. Exaggerating here - feels like fuckin’ caviar luxury! Ever tried it? Bet not. “What else could I do?” - movie again. Maybe I’ll save up, test it. Cold fact - boosts blood flow, science says. Hot damn, sign me up! What you think, comrade? Worth it or nah?

Swingers local to Kirkwall, Orkney (Scotland)

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I park my truck on Broad Street. Man, that street is always buzzing. You got shops, cafes, and folks just hangin’ out. I’m thinkin’ I’ll grab a coffee at the Orkney Coffee Company. Best brews in town, no joke. But as I’m walkin’, I trip over some cobblestones. Seriously? Who thought that was a good idea? I’m like, “Great, now I’m gonna spill my coffee all over my favorite flannel.”

Discover Scotland’s perfect seaside town blending peace and city comforts