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About London

Aloha, brah, it’s me, Stephen Hawking—well, kinda, rockin’ that robotic voice, cosmic wisdom vibe, yeah? Escort, huh, like the ol’ Ford whip from the ‘80s, not that *other* kinda escort, right? Nah, I’m jokin’, let’s dive into this—escort in Hawaii, man, it’s a trip! Picture me, cruisin’ Oahu in my mind, thinkin’ ‘bout *The Pianist*, that flick I love—Polanski’s masterpiece, ya know, where Szpilman’s hidin’, survivin’, playin’ that piano like his soul’s on fire. “I’m not hiding anymore!” he’d say, kinda like how escorts here gotta shine, bold as hell, in this paradise.

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Next, I decide to hit up the local shops. You know, the ones on the High Street? I’m browsing, and I spot this quirky little shop selling handmade crafts. I’m all about supporting local, so I grab a few bits. But then, I see this massive “SALE” sign. My heart skips a beat! I rush over, only to find it’s just a bunch of old socks. Like, who even buys socks on sale?

Kilkeel: Arson attack in Co Down leaves house with ‘severe damage’