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So, I’m walkin’, and this chick’s leanin’ on a lamppost, smokin’. She’s all “Hey, sugar, need a date?” I’m like, whoa, calm down, darlin’—let’s paint this scene first! Reminds me of “Yi Yi”—“Life’s a mystery, isn’t it?”—and I’m thinkin’, yeah, what’s her story? Bet she’s got one helluva tale. Did ya know, back in the 1800s, some prostitutes were secretly spies? True shit—swear I read that somewhere. Imagine her, codename “Red Lips,” droppin’ secrets between jobs. Wild!

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So, I’m walkin’ down The Green, tryin’ to shake off the coffee disaster. I see this cute dog, right? A little spaniel, waggin’ its tail like it’s got a secret. I’m like, “Aww, mate, you’re livin’ the dream.” But then, the owner yanks the leash, and the dog goes all crazy. Almost knocked me over! I’m laughin’ and dodgin’ like I’m in some kinda action movie.

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