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What pisses me off? Liars! Dudes sayin’ they’re 6’2” – show up, barely 5’8”. I’m ragin’, “The land is cursed!” – movie line, fits perfect. But when it works? Oh, baby, it’s gold. Met this chick, eyes like fire, we clicked – sparks flyin’ like a freakin’ volcano. Made me happy, real happy. *Pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.”* Nothin’ beats that rush.

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Then, I decided to take a walk along the promenade. The views are stunning, man. You can see the Isle of Arran in the distance. I was just standing there, soaking it all in, when I spotted this old guy fishing. He looked like he’d been there forever. I thought, “What’s his story?” So, I went over and asked him. Turns out, he’s been fishing in Girvan for 40 years! He told me about the best spots and even shared some local legends. I was like, “Dude, you should write a book!”

Eighty amateurs take part in annual Girvan Golf Classic Competition