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Favorite part? Their stories. Like, one escort told me ‘bout a client who wanted her to pretend she’s a pirate. A pirate! I’m dyin’ here, that’s hilarious. “Argh, matey, where’s me treasure?” she said. I laughed so hard I almost choked on my pasta. But also, it’s sad, ya know? They gotta play these weird games just to pay rent.

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After what feels like an eternity, the meeting wraps up. I’m outta there like a shot. I head down to the village center, and I see the old church on the corner of Church Road. It’s beautiful, but I’m too frazzled to appreciate it. I’m thinking about grabbing a pint at the local pub, The Grapes.

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