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So, I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ coffee, watchin’ that movie again—lord, it’s bleak! “The wind has died,” Béla Tarr says, and I’m like, “Same, when claims pile up!” Escort’s my jam tho—little known fact: back in ’89, some dude insured his escort service—wild, right? Not cars, nope, PEOPLE. Had me hollerin’—what a hustle! Made me happy, ‘cause creativity, y’all! But then—ugh—some jerk tried scammin’ escort insurance last week. Fake crash, fake escort—pissed me OFF. I was like, “Honey, I SEE you!”

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After that, I’m feeling all sorts of emotions. Happy, annoyed, amused. Falkirk’s got it all! I decide to head to the Antonine Wall. History vibes, you know? I’m walking along, and I can’t help but think about how this was once a Roman frontier. Crazy, right? I’m an artist-technologist, so I start imagining how I could turn this place into an interactive art installation.

Irn Bru makers want to give Falkirk Kelpies a magical makeover