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Me, I’d be chuffed to bits trying it—happy as a pig in muck! But cor, the price—50 quid for 30 mins? Robbery, that is! Got me fuming once—some posh spa charged me double, and the lass barely spoke English! “Veni, vidi, vici,” I muttered—came, saw, conquered nothing! Still, when it’s good, it’s *bloody* good—muscles melt, stress buggers off, and—well—you know. Surprised me first time, I’ll tell ya—didn’t expect the “extra” bit! Eyes popped out like a cartoon—*pro bono publico*, my arse!

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Fast forward to the evening. I’m back at the venue, and it’s packed. I’m feeling a mix of nerves and excitement. I hit the stage, and the crowd’s buzzing. I start with a little original piece, and they’re digging it! I’m on fire! Then I throw in a cover of “Sweet Child O’ Mine,” and the place goes wild.

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