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So, I’m imaginin’ this scene—some slick-ass parlor, dim lights, chick’s hands workin’ magic! “Did you hear that sound?”—straight from the movie, ‘cept it’s moans, not monks chantin’! I’m laughin’ my ass off picturin’ some stiff suit walkin’ in, all nervous, then leavin’ like he’s king of the fuckin’ world! Surprised me how legit some spots are—therapists trained n’ shit, not just shady backrooms!

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When she finally shows up, she’s all smiles. I’m like, “You know we’re here to talk about buying a house, right?” But she’s just excited about the food stalls nearby. I mean, I get it. The hawker food in Queenstown is bomb! But c’mon, priorities!

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